DEF don’t eat this.

celebrity chef antony worrall thompson has apologized for recommending the use of poisonous plants in his recipes. during a really boring magazine interview about watercress and other random weeds that grow in your yard, worrall thompson told interviewers that the weed henbane was “great in salads”. worrall thompson clearly has never had henbane in his salads, otherwise he wouldn’t have been able to give the stupid interview because he would be DEAD. ooooooops! he later retracted his statement and apologized for his mistake. he said he meant to recommend “fat hen” which is also a wild herb. well, i’m pretty sure no one died because they followed his recipe since how many people waste money on healthy & organic living magazine? worrall thompson is obviously an idiot and should just go back to making grilled cheese sandwiches (the kind with white bread on one side, and wheat on the other) in an elementary school cafeteria.

chi fan le ma?

the BBC has created a list of “dos and don’ts” for foreigners while in beijing for this summer’s olympic games. learning the phrase “chi fan le ma?” tops the list. it’s translated as “have you eaten?” and is important to know, cause if you just shake your head “yes” all the time you ain’t gettin’ no food son. the list also says to be prepared for locals attempting to practice their english with you. don’t get confused if you hear a beijing local constantly talking about “CHIN-ER” or “CHIN-OR”. that’s just their ridiculous heavy beijing accent. it has a strong RRRRRRR on most words and can sound like they are growling at you. the dude is just talking about CHINA. took us a while to figure that out. HI SAM! i GUESS the most important tip is not calling you waitress a whore. “xiaojie” means “miss” but can be misinterpreted to mean lady friend. a better term to use is “fuwuyuan” which is close to “garcon”. now if you call someone that and she whips out a cell phone or calculator, she definitely is a lady caller and is ready to negotiate a price! might i suggest finding one of these nice ladies at night in “sanlitun”, which is a popular bar area near worker’s stadium (SOCCER!). during the day, the starbucks at the holiday inn in the “lido” area is probably as sure thing as well. LAST, but not least. don’t be surprised if you see security guards will large guns in fine establishments like mcdonald’s or KFC. they are just protecting the chicken type product they serve there!

wait? you mean my eel drink is fake? not cool.

the japanese have done it again! they managed to make something that tastes like something else even though it really is not that? or is it? i’m confused. japan tobacco inc. plans to launch it’s new drink “unagi norobi” or “surging eel” later this month. yep yep yep. this drink is suppose to be made from eel, which many japanese believe helps boots stamina in hot weather. better drink one before jumping in the sack boys. the fizzy yellow drink contains extracts from the eel head and bones plus those important letters A, B1, B2, D and E, which are also found in fish. this drink just may add to the high demand for eel that is already present in japan. eel fraud cases are becoming high profile. so is it really eel in my drink???? hmm so should we try this, why not for $1.30? well if you can get over the fact that you are drinking eel for pleasure, then maybe you’ll enjoy the fact that it resembles “kaba-yaki” style flavors, which is broiled eel with a sweet sauce. the less adverterous of us will probably stick to unagi donburi the next time we have a craving for eel.

the south fat? who woulda thunk it?

it’s official. traditional southern home cooking makes you fat. i mean it’s official now. the CDC said so.

no, fried okra and creamed corn does not count as vegetables.